A Couple Onions, Neighbor?

I was trying to cook Chinese food a couple nights ago, and I realized that I needed onions. Naturally, the best resources when lacking a necessary cooking ingredient are a little brother and a bag of homemade caramel popcorn. My brother left the house--caramel corn in hand--and minutes later returned with two small onions. He had bargained with the neighbors and, frankly, I think the neighbors got the better end of the deal. But I got my onions. Everyone's a winner!